On nights like this, desire drips like deep, echoing splashes in the recesses of my heart. I try to immortalize the epiphanies revealed to me in my recent read but there seems to be no words I can find to epitomize the churning I feel within me. I seem to have let myself forget that books have that sort of magic over me- wrecking me completely with its relevance and every author's ability to accurately describe intangible things.. Things I've fought my life trying to string into a sentence. 

This caving, swallowing emptiness reminds me of why I even stopped reading in the first place. What is the use of the revelation without application? It is nothing to me but a spotlight in a dimming room, bringing to light a hole that punctures my being. As much as I love these truths and I crave for the adventures I can potentially embark on, I know that my soul thirsts for a different kind of story. This Story not only reveals but refills. It sheds light and gives light. It floods my heart and refreshes my mind. I desire for a Book as such, where there is truth in every sentence and love sewn on every page. And the most crucial thing of said Book (that sets it apart from the rest) is that it leaves me filled with hope, not desire.

I don't think I'll ever stop reading, no, because that's something I've grown to like very much. (You need water but you like fizzy drinks, right?) But a lesson learnt today is to never read on an empty heart. (Never ever live on fizzy drinks.) Take it back to the cross, apply it to your spiritual walk. Don't let it buy you over with roadtrips and icy mountains and the boy with the blue eyes and six strings on his back. Because thinking about lives you will never live is creating an unexplainable desire for something entirely unrealistic. Instead, dig deep between the lines; look for the things you can learn: Always give yourself to loving others; do one thing everyday that scares you; life is an adventure anywhere; you are beautiful; life's really all about perspective. Take it to God and lay it out on the altar. Throw away the junk and sieve out the priceless ones. I remember this quote I recently heard of by AW Tozer and it says "There is no divide between the sacred and the secular. It's not what you do that counts but why you do it that is crucial. Motivation is everything!" 

And I am sure, that in everything we do, we're striving to grow closer to our Heavenly Father. So take whatever the devil may use to throw you off track and turn it around to seek God better! Be blessed my friends; and to those who understand these feelings, big giant hugs! xx